


our bodies, born to heal

by lilhex



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: (only in the 2nd chapter), (these last 3 tags are only for the 2nd chapter), Alternate Universe - ASWCU (Anna's Star Wars Cinematic Universe), Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Food as a Metaphor for Love, Gift Fic, Huddling For Warmth, Literal Sleeping Together, Multi, OT3, Sharing Body Heat, Snowed In, Swearing, Tea, brewing tea as a love language, tea as a metaphor for love, this can be read as both romantic and platonic but personally i choose to see it as romantic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:15:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27383308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilhex/pseuds/lilhex
Summary: Resting her head against Cassian’s chest, Bodhi curled up against her back, his own head resting on her shoulder, she whispered,“Is this the end of the world?”
Relationships: Cassian Andor & Jyn Erso & Bodhi Rook, Cassian Andor/Jyn Erso/Bodhi Rook
Comments: 7
Kudos: 13





	1. laughing til our ribs get tough

**Author's Note:**

  * For [my friend darna](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=my+friend+darna).



> Disclaimer: don’t call me out on inconstencies with broader Star Wars lore because I don’t know much about that and refuse to get lost on a Wookipedia deep-dive. Please enjoy it as a part of the extended ASWU (Anna’s Star Wars Universe – anna is me).
> 
> The title of the fanfic is from Sleeping at Last's song Mars, and the individual chapter titles are from Lorde's Ribs.

Jyn took it in, the wide space opening up before her, the rebel battleships and the gear, the wires connecting the place, the way the sun, this foreign sun, filtered through the Temple’s doors and windows.

She hadn’t felt that still in years.

This was a place that was _loved._ Oddly, it didn’t feel an in-between, all business and comings and goings (or, more often than not, goings and never-coming-backs). It _should_ be a place accustomed to goodbyes, sorrow and battle injury. The average rebel lifespan was short; this was no place to call a home, no place to raise children. And yet, it felt _warm_.

Most of the noise around her was probably much louder, but the wide space drowned it out, reduced it to ambience. Conversations flowed about her, boots stomped this way and that, machines were repaired, constructed, deconstructed. A rebellion in full swing, a living organism.

She leaned back against the curved wall of the Temple, closing her eyes and letting the hum around her lull her thoughts away. She felt tired, and whenever she felt tired she felt _old_.

How old was she? How old was she in Yavin 4, how long was a year here? Oh, to hell with that – what was her point of reference, anyway? People aged no different in space than they would if they stayed put. She’d roamed through the galaxy, jumped to hyperspace again and again, and yet the ageing process had still caught up with her.

Not that she meant to be running away from it, a life where she grew old. It’s just that it had never seemed a possibility, and though she knew she was still young, even in Yavin years, she had already lived through enough for more than one lifetime.

“It’s peaceful here, isn’t it?”

She opened her eyes and turned – without startling. Like the voice had said, it was peaceful.

“Bodhi,” she smiled.

The young man smiled, large brown eyes beaming. His hair was slicked back in a ponytail as ever, though it looked shiny and clean now. He’d changed out of his Empirical uniform, and was now in a jumpsuit that was slightly baggy on him. He was crouched across from her and on the cargo box between them were two steaming cups.

“I got you some tea. It’s nice. My recipe.”

“Oh…”

Jyn reached out to one of the cups, almost perfectly round and surprisingly deep, and picked it up; it stayed cold on the outside. For a moment, white steam filled her vision, though she could still Bodhi’s outline behind it, framed by the setting light filling up the Temple.

“Thanks? You can say thanks, you know. _Thanks, Bodhi, for the calming tea_.”

He said the last part in a smaller voice, not all the way mockingly, at least not with malice.

Jyn tried pushing down the edges of her mouth but they betrayed her; she broke into a smile and found herself saying _thanks_ around it, enveloped in the pleasant scent of whatever the hell that beverage was.

Bodhi reached out for the second cup. The sleeves of his jumpsuit stretched short over his wrists, in stark contrast with how baggily the rest of it hung on him.

She blew over the cup before taking a sip.

It was hot, maybe too hot, but she hadn’t had something that warm in a good while, and it tasted weird, but _good_ , and oddly enough, perfectly like something Bodhi would make.

She’s had beverages and meals prepared for her before, among Saw’s hideouts and later, on the run, as she banded together with runaways and bandits hailing from every last corner of the galaxy. Sometimes, the food they would make brought something else forth; something their own, something she knew was not in anybody else’s version of the same recipe. She knew _her_ cooking bore none of that; all she’d ever cooked had been instant portions, made out of need than pleasure, to be consumed for need than pleasure.

“Didn’t think they taught you how to make calming tea at flight training,” she remarked, kindly. A conversation opener, not an invitation to fight.

“They did not. That’s a recipe from Jedha.”

 _Oh_.

Was her first thought.

_Right, Jedha, the city we watched get blown to bits earlier on. Right._

Was her second thought.

And her third thought, and the one after that, were something like this,

Bodhi in his hometown, drinking tea with his friends, his family. Bodhi, in some cold, far-off moon, warming up cold bodies cuddled around a small fire, all wearing identical uniforms underneath the blankets tightly wrapped around them. Bodhi, recently robbed forever of his home, brining home with him, warming her up, her, who was so undeserving, who had only caused him grief and trouble by association.

She looked at the young man before her and found Bodhi looking back, smiling just as warmly as before. The hair that strayed from his ponytail was painted golden in the sun.

“Do you think he’d like some too? Cassian?” Bodhi asked, eyes wide.

Jyn cocked her head at him, considering him, and decided she liked the breathless quality in his voice when he spoke. It made him sound anxious, and he often had been in the short time Jyn had known him, though she began to realize that was just how he spoke. Whether it was because he _was_ anxious most of the time, or if that was simply the way his voice painted his words, she had yet to deduce.

“Ask him yourself,” she said playfully, and watched as Bodhi’s eyes grew wider.

So he _was_ anxious.

“What? Are you afraid of him?”

“No, I’m not, I just think – I just think… Fine. I’ll ask him.”

“Wait. I was kidding.”

Bodhi, half-up, fell back down on his bum. She looked at him looking at her, until they both, simultaneously and suddenly, burst out laughing.

Jyn’s ribs hurt. She couldn’t remember the last time she had laughed that hard. They were both on the floor, limbs tangled, shaking with the relief and joy of being alive rather than humor, and through her tears, Jyn still found Cassian, standing closer than she thought, looking at them perplexed. Reaching for her now empty mug, she raised it to him in a toasting motion.


	2. sharing beds like little kids

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the one where jyn says fuck, please don't correct me on how they don't say fuck on the star wars universe because i'm aware and have simply elected to ignore it. this is the aswcu or however its spelled and youre all trapped in here with me
> 
> [stardust symbol source](https://cutekaomoji.com/misc/sparkles/)

“Bodhi?” Cassian’s voice rang out, slicing the dark in half. “Do you copy?”

“I – I do. I’m fine,” Bodhi responded from somewhere to her left, voice hoarse but ready.

“Jyn?” she hadn’t properly registered, or perhaps undermined, the worry in Cassian’s voice until it was her name being called.

She had also omitted to register the terrible ringing in her ears, or the way her head was hammering.

“ _Jyn!_ ”

There was no undermining the worry now.

“I copy,” she spat out, on all fours on the spaceship floor, head down between her elbows.

From somewhere on her left, she could feel a shuffling, that of a rather long, rather clumsy human body dragging itself through whatever obstacles had fallen between itself and Jyn’s own body in the crash. Then a gentle hand touched her side, and then moments later found her arm.

Bodhi dragged his hand down the length of her arm, until he found her wrist, and then there were long, coarse fingers wrapping around her wrist, applying no pressure. She knew he wasn’t checking her pulse, not really, but knowing that he could feel it, the blood beating madly through her, was what got her to sit up and, clearing her voice, elaborate that,

“I’m fine, mostly.”

“Yeah, we’re fine,” Bodhi reported. From the pilot’s seat, they could hear Cassian shuffling about. Some buttons were pressed, others punched, a lever or two pulled.

Eventually, Bodhi ventured to ask, “What’s happened?”

“Shit’s fucked,” Jyn volunteered. “I think,” she added.

From Cassian’s end of the ship came a dry laugh.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

“It’s beyond repair,” Bodhi concluded, hauling his upper body from the inside of the engine. “At least with the equipment we’ve got on board.”

“No communication, either,” Cassian reported, yanking his headphones off. “We’re completely disconnected.”

“Just my luck,” Jyn muttered, pissed off.

She had been holding the lantern up for Bodhi while he was inspecting the outer engine, and her teeth had yet to stop clattering, _not to mention_ her fingers were nearly frozen off. That’s fingerless gloves for you.

“Thank you for your input, Jyn. Constructive as always,” Cassian said, dropping the headphones and walking back to the cockpit to press and punch the buttons all over again, expecting, apparently, for them to miraculously work.

The three of them were safely locked indoors in the spaceship now, the snow that Jyn and Bodhi had dragged in melting slowly on the floor. But there was no heating, and no power, and Jyn was beginning to get really fucking pissed.

She yanked off her gloves and began rubbing her hands together, fingers icy cold against her palms.

“There’s thermal blankets in overhead storage,” Cassian said over his shoulder, presumably to her. “…Somewhere.”

Rolling her eyes, she walked off to punch some overhead storage doors open, only to grow more annoyed when backpacks and emergency kits came tumbling down instead.

(The same backpacks and emergency kits she had shoved messily back up after the crash.)

“Fuck! How long are we stuck here?” she asked, turning to the general direction of the other two.

Cassian turned to Bodhi, eyebrows raised, seconding the question.

“At least ’til morning,” he said. “We can’t move during the snowstorm. We lost three troopers last time.”

Jyn cringed at the first plural Bodhi used to group himself with the Empire troops, but pushed it aside. This cursed place had put him through enough twice, and he was allowed to be reliving the first time now.

Bodhi was the only one in the Rebellion to have visited this cold, forgotten solar system at the edge of the galaxy, on a mission for the Empire years ago. Now, the three of them were here to gather what digital footprint the Empire troops had left behind, locked off to an abandoned base on this snow moon. According to their intelligence, they were crucial enough to risk sending three poor motherfuckers, including Captain Cassian Andor and The Guy Who Has Actually Been Here Before on a damned mission that seemed determined, if not to kill them, to at least inconvenience them on every other possible way.

As far as her own presence was concerned, Jyn was convinced she was just asked to tag along because she was friends with the other two. Which, now that she was reminded, it was not so bad. She found herself secretly grinning as she crouched down to pick up the shit that had dropped from the overhead storage.

Maybe she _was_ stuck at the end of the world, but she was stuck at the end of the world with the two people she would rather be stuck with, and none of them was dying, which was a plus.

“Will we find the equipment we need in the base?” Cassian was asking Bodhi.

“We should, yeah. If not to fix the ship, at least enough to revive a signal and send word back home.”

 _Home_.

Jyn stretched to reach the overhead storage, when she felt another pair of arms enveloping her, taking the backpack she was holding and stretching above her head to put it in place, all with relative ease.

“Hmf,” Jyn grumbled, pretending to lose her balance for a second to allow herself a moment of rest against Cassian’s chest.

“Leave it to me,” he said next to her ear, voice soft.

She knew that taking half a step forward and turning to face him would mean their faces would be entirely too close together still, but she did it anyway, and found herself looking at Cassian, who was looking right back.

“Look for the blankets. We’ll need them tonight.”

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

They ended up taking refuge in the emergency pod for the night. Without the heater, they needed to savor all the heat they could, and the smallest space in the spaceship was the best suited for their purpose. It was also, surprisingly, the coziest area in the entire spaceship, two seating rows facing each other, leaving not much space between them.

Jyn and Cassian dropped most of their stuff down heavy and immediately set to unwrapping the blankets. Their material was softer than Jyn had anticipated, and their situation was improved further when Bodhi walked in, carrying a tray of cups and mugs, all steaming and smelling good. Well, smelling like food and warm tea. Jyn could work with that.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

Wrapped tightly in blankets and bundled close, the snowstorm audible even through the soundproof walling, the three of them sat on the floor enjoying their dinner away.

Jyn sipped her tea, miraculously warm, and allowed herself a moment to swap the cold, dim lighting in the escape pod with the golden brilliancy of the sun on that day on Yavin 4, the first time that Bodhi had brewed them tea.

“You said it was a local recipe. In Jedha.”

“Huh?” Bodhi elbowed her right back. “Yeah, it is.”

“Where do you find it, now? How do you make it again?”

“The ingredients are pretty commonplace in galactic markets, actually,” he muttered around the rim of his mug. “It’s all about the proportions.”

Jyn took another sip. Pressed against her other side, Cassian kept silent, but she could swear there was a smile playing on the edge of his lips. She wasn’t the only one reminiscing that day.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

The storm wouldn’t die down even when their conversation did and its raging became all they could hear.

Resting her head against Cassian’s chest, Bodhi curled up against her back, his own head resting on her shoulder, she whispered,

“Is this the end of the world?”

She had thought Bodhi was asleep, but his arm snaked up against hers to give her a reassuring squeeze.

“No,” Cassian whispered, fingers reaching up to caress her hair. “Maybe just the end of us,” he chuckled, “but the world will keep going.”

But when they woke the next morning, limbs gone dead under each other’s weight, the morning sun was filtering through the top of the window, the smallest corner that the snow didn’t touch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you enjoyed, i'd love if if you'd kindly leave kudos and a comment!
> 
> you can also find me on tumblr @ hippolvte!


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